I had a pretty great squat workout a few days past, and had immediately posted this to my own personal blog. I thought I would share it here, because I think it touches on some of the core OpSLED concepts, as well as an idea I addressed in the last entry.
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In a gym known for eccentricity, I might have just carved myself out a new niche.
I just had a terrific squat workout, five brutal sets of eight brutal reps each. Nothing to really write home about for around 90% of the gym, but nor was it too shabby for a guy who’s never taken squats seriously until the last year or so.
I wrapped my rosary around the horizontal support for the squat rack so that it was dangling in front of me while I pounded out the reps. The squats hurt. A lot. But then I’d find myself focusing on the crucifix rotating in front of me from the force of my exhales, and I’d think, “oh, yeah, I guess it doesn’t hurt all that bad, after all”.
Really kind of puts things into perspective.
I had a lot to think about tonight, and a lot to pray about, and a lot of fury that I felt OK taking out on the weights. I killed a few birds with one stone, I guess. And my legs. I’m seriously having some trouble with stairs right now. And am emotionally exhausted. It’s been a week, I’ll tell you what.
But, then again, perspective. Right. And strength. Right.
But yeah, a few people did double takes at my mumbling, struggling self squatting in front of a dangling rosary. And they nodded in seeming approval.
I might just become maniacal enough to fit in there after all.
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There are several things here I’d like to expand on over time, but one thing that I hope immediately jumps out is that simply by getting in there, busting ass, trying my best to suck a little less than last time out, and frankly not giving a damn about what other people thought of me, I fit right in with a group of people who were a lot bigger, stronger, and badder than I.
There was a time not too long ago where I whould have avoided doing lifts I’m not that great at, out of fear of sticking out as a weakling. Obviously, this is a self-defeating strategy, as every time that I avoided a workout, I only put off actual progress that much longer.
But the truth of the matter is, it wasn’t the other, more capable, less-sucking people present that made me feel uncomfortable; it was me, and me alone. MY own insecurities, and nothing more. Nobody really gives a damn how much weight you’re putting up in the gym. What they notice is that you bring it all, throw yourself into every rep, and give Sucking Less Every Day the ol’ college try.
A whole other idea that I would like to address more in depth another time is that of my faith. It’s a shame how much popular culture has either demonized or emasculated men of faith in recent years. But plenty of the blame for that can also be placed squarely on the faithful themselves. Sadly, many of today’s churches do a pretty piss-poor job at representing the ideas on which they were founded. But, again, that’s a whole ‘nuther topic for a whole ‘nuther time.